The Words: A Rilaya Story
by honey-and-peaches
Summary: Maya Hart has some words she desperately needs to say to Riley Matthews. Little does she know that Riley also has words she desperately needs to say, but unlike Maya, Riley does not know what they are yet.
1. Maya's Words

_~set in the tenth grade, maya opted out of the triangle back in the ninth grade and riley has been dating lucas for the past two months~_

If you asked Maya Hart to pinpoint the exact moment she fell in love with Riley Matthews, she wouldn't be able to tell you, because there hadn't been only one moment. She just knew that she was in love with her, and that she'd been in love her for so long that she couldn't remember what it felt like not to be in love with her.

What she could tell you though was when she realised she was in love with Riley Matthews. It had been a completely ordinary day, nothing special, nothing new. They'd been sitting in the bay window, just talking and laughing like they always did. And Maya was looking at Riley, really looking at her; maybe looking at her properly for the first. She was looking at the way the light fell on Riley's face; how the light also seemed to becoming from Riley, not just outside; how she smiled, with not just her mouth and eyes, but with everything; how beautiful she truly was; how kind; how smart. That was when Maya realised.

That was also when she realised that she had been right: hope was for suckers. Riley loved Lucas. Not Maya.

So when Maya climbed through the bay window after receiving a text from Riley that said, 'Bay window right now' and saw Riley's very-determined-to-get-the-truth face, she felt scared straight away.

"Hey Honey," she said carefully, as she sat down.

"Maya?"

"Yes?"

"Are you okay?" Riley asked, sounding concerned.

 _No._

"I'm fine, Riles," Maya lied as convincingly as she could.

It wasn't convincing enough though.

"Maya, please, you've been acting strange for months, and I'm determined to get to the bottom of it. I just want the truth. I want to make it better." She sounded so concerned and so genuine, that it hurt Maya. It hurt because she knew that Riley really was concerned and genuine; she knew Riley loved her, just not in the same way. And that was why it hurt.

Maya looked down at her lap, mentally reminding herself not to let anything slip. She couldn't risk her friendship with Riley for anything.

There was no way Maya Hart could live without Riley Matthews.

She looked back up at Riley, her eyes darting to Riley's lips for a second. Then she smiled, "Really, Riley, I'm fine."

"If you don't want to tell me, Maya, that's okay. But I know you're not fine. I know you better than anyone. And this isn't you."

Maya didn't respond, her heart beating at an impossible speed. The words, she could feel them, wanting to burst out; to be shouted as Farkle had shouted Riley's.

Maya looked away from Riley. She wanted to look at Riley. She wanted to so bad, but these feelings, these unspoken words were eating her alive; they had been for months, and instead of going away, the words were just becoming more and more impatient.

Riley took Maya's chin in her hand and turned Maya to face her. Tears glistened in Maya's eyes, but she smiled anyway, and Riley smiled back at her friend, tilting her head. "Peaches," she said, lovingly.

Maya laughed, and wiped her eyes, "Yes, Honey?"

"You know your my favourite person in the world."

 _I'm not your favourite person like your mine._

Maya gulped, and she pushed Riley's hand away gently. New tears were making their way into her eyes.

They were eating her up, the words. They were going to kill her eventually if she didn't say them.

 _Say them. Just say them. They are only words._

 _Words with the power to change everything_.

"Riles, I-," Maya took a deep breath.

'Say us!' the words seemed to cry, 'Just say us!'

"You're about to tell me, aren't you?" Riley asked.

Maya nodded, "Yeah," she managed to say.

 _No going back now._

Maya looked Riley directly in the eyes, those wonderfully happy eyes, except they weren't happy right now. They were full of concern for her favourite person in the world.

'SAY US!' the words were no longer crying, they were screaming to get out.

"I love you," Maya said quickly, still staring straight at Riley. The words were out now, and Maya felt so much lighter, it was strange how heavy words could be. They were gone, after months of carrying them around. They were hanging in the air between Maya and Riley, pulsing with electricity. But they were out of Maya. She was no longer keeping her secret words trapped.

Riley smiled, and looked confused, "I love you too, Maya, you know that."

The words were back inside Maya.

But she couldn't do this again.

"No, Riley. I'm in love with you." She said it slower this time, and let the words out one at a time. They were free, and Riley had heard them for what they meant. Months of secret keeping and a lifetime of love; thousands of moments wrapped up in a couple of words; hope; defeat. And Riley understood it all.

"Oh," was all she managed to say, her heart beating in her chest, as she processed the words. She understood them, everything they meant, but processing them was something else entirely.

Maya's heart was beating fast too. Had she made a mistake? Should she have kept the words to herself? "Riley, I don't want this to make it weird between us. This friendship, it's- it's..." she was unable to finish, but Riley understood anyway.

"It's everything to me too, Maya." She said firmly, "I love you,"

"But differently." It wasn't a question, it was a statement. A sad, defeated, hope-crushing statement.

"You're my favourite person in the world, Maya," Riley repeated.

"And you're mine," Maya said, a hint of sadness in her voice. She held up her hand and Riley grasped it, entwining her fingers with Maya's. Their friendship rings gleamed in the sun.

"From the day we met." Riley whispered.

Maya put her head on Riley's shoulder, "Riley?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

"For what?"

After almost a minute, Maya finally replied, "You know," was all she said, because it was all that needed to be said.

Riley smiled and rested her head on Maya's; their hands still entwined.

She did know.

Except Maya didn't know.

Maya didn't know that maybe she was wrong.

Maybe Riley didn't love Maya differently.

The words were Riley's now. She just had to work what they mean before she could say them.


	2. Riley's Words

Maya Hart had never been one to be uncertain, Riley Matthews, however, was a different matter. She had promised that Maya's feelings wouldn't affect their friendship, but they were.

How could Maya be so sure if Riley was not?

Maya had told Riley about her feelings just over a week ago, and it was nearing vacation. Riley was torn; these unknown words eating her away. Lucas knew something up, which was why he wasn't as surprised as he should've been, when she broke up with him on the first day of the vacation. He was still slightly shocked and hurt, because even though he'd been almost expecting it, it was a shock that Riley Matthews, the Kind Sunshine Princess had broken up with him, her Prince, her Dream Boy.

She didn't tell Maya about it, which meant she had a couple of days to try and work out her feelings; work out what those words meant, before Maya inevitably found out.

But the real reason she didn't tell Maya was because she was scared Maya would think she was the reason Riley had broken up with Lucas.

And the even realer, scarier reason was that she was scared that Maya really was the reason she'd broken up with Lucas.

It was four days into vacation and Riley was sitting in the Bay Window on her computer, when an angry Maya Hart pushed open a window and clambered in, sitting next to Riley and glaring at her. "YOU BROKE UP WITH HIM?! AND DIDN'T TELL ME?!"

Riley shut the laptop calmly and put it down, "Hello, Maya."

"Why didn't you tell me, Riley?" Maya asked, quieter; a lot more serious.

"It- Uh... It- It must've slipped my mind," Riley said, as casually as she could muster.

"Slipped your mind?!" Maya said, her tone of voice entering the deadly regions.

"Yeah," Riley gulped and didn't quite meet Maya's eyes.

"Riley, please, please say this had nothing to do with what I told you." Maya pleaded.

"I- I-" Riley stuttered.

 _Maya was honest with me, I can't lie to her._

"I can't." She finally said.

She'd said the wrong thing.

Maya looked furious. "You said this wasn't going to affect our friendship! You promised!"

"It's not!" Riley cried back, "Lucas has nothing to do with our friendship!"

"Then why'd you break up with him?!"

"I don't know, Maya! Okay? I don't know!" Riley said loudly, desperation in her voice. "How can you be so certain of your feelings, Maya? You said I was in love with Lucas, but I'm not. I wasn't, ever. You said I love you differently, but I don't know if I do."

Maya looked at Riley and began to shake her head slowly. "No," she muttered, "no, no, no," she repeated looking away from Riley, head in hands.

"Maya," Riley said carefully, placing her hand on Maya's back.

Maya looked up and Riley's hand fell away, "Riley, you- you can't say that." Maya said, trying to sound calm, but the tremble in her voice gave her away.

 _But it's the truth._

"Why?" Riley demanded.

Maya looked at her incredulously, as if she couldn't believe Riley wasn't getting it. "Because, Riley, I can't help but hope for things now. And something this big, it's gonna hurt, a lot."

Riley could see the fear in her eyes, the fear of hope.

 _The hope I gave her._

"Anyway," Maya added, "why would you be in love with me."

"I could say the same for you," Riley replied.

Maya smiled at her and held Riley's cheek in her hand, "Because, you're the most wonderful person in the world."

Riley lifted her hand to touch Maya's. "Am I though?"

Maya pulled her hand away and gulped, "Yeah."

There was so much pain on Maya's face that it hurt Riley.

Physically hurt her somewhere deep down, "Peaches," she whispered, lifting her hand to touch Maya's cheek now.

 _I'm so sorry, Peaches._

But Maya pushed it away, "No, Riley." She said firmly. "Tell me, please, tell me right now, that you're not in love with me." Tears were rolling down her cheek now and splashing on to the Bay Window cushions.

"Maya," Riley said, bewildered.

"Please. The sooner you say it, the less it'll hurt."

So Riley buried the still unknown words down somewhere deep with her pain and instead said different ones: "I'm not in love with you."

Maya smiled at Riley; it was a smile full of pain, despair and relief; her tears still falling. "Thank you." She said.

"Does it hurt?" Riley asked, holding her own tears back.

Maya nodded, and rested her head on Riley's, "Yeah, but it'll stop."

Riley rested her head on Maya's and entwined her own fingers with Maya's, "You know I'd never want to hurt you."

"I know," Maya whispered, squeezing Riley's hand.

So there they sat, in their Bay Window, both crying quietly. Head-on-shoulder; hand-in-hand.

Maya left a couple of hours later; she giving Riley a hug that was meant to be quick, but their hands, faces, and mouths lingered too close and too long in places they shouldn't, for it be quick and fleeting. Smiling at Riley awkwardly, Maya climbed out the window.

Both her parents were home, and Riley knew it wouldn't be long until one (or both) of them came in to ask her what had happened. She knew they'd heard some of the louder, more heated parts of their discussion.

Sure enough, five minutes later, Topanga carefully opened Riley's bedroom door and stepped in; pushing Cory out, (hissing, "Cory, this is mother-daughter stuff!") and shut the door behind her.

She sat down next to her daughter in the Bay Window, and pulled her into a one-armed hug, "You okay, Riley?"

Riley shook her head, as they stopped hugging.

"Do you want to tell me what's wrong?" Topanga asked.

"Have you ever done something that might cause you and the people you care about less pain right now, then say, in the future if you don't do it, even if it's not the right thing?" Riley asked slowly.

"Yeah," replied Topanga.

Her answer surprised Riley, "Really? You have?"

"Yeah, I have. I broke up with your father about a year into our engagement because I was scared. My mom and dad were getting a divorce, and the one think that had kept from thinking that your dad and I were mad for getting married so young, was that my parents had gotten married young, and we're still so in love. Except they weren't, and that scared me. I saw how much they disliked each other and how much they were hurting, and I didn't want that for me and Cory, so I broke up with him. Because I thought, even though it would cause us pain now, it would be less in the long run and we wouldn't end up hating each other. But you can never know what the future will hold, Riley, so all I did was cause us pain. And my life now: You, Auggie, me, and your father, is better than I ever could've dreamed. Even if there is pain in the future, I would not swap this happiness for anything. You can't let your fear of the future control the present." Topanga told her.

Riley began to smile. Her mother was right. "I won't. Not anymore." She said firmly.

She wasn't afraid of them anymore. Not of her future, not of her feelings and not of the words.

"You okay now, Riley?" Topanga asked, giving her daughter another hug.

"I will be, very soon, yeah." Riley replied.

Topanga stood up and walked towards the door, she stopped and turned to face Riley, smiling, "You should call her," Topanga said, before leaving and closing the door behind.

Riley quickly pulled her phone out of her pocket and called Maya.

"Come on, pick up, pick up, pick up," she muttered, jiggling her leg up and down.

"'Sup, it's Maya!"

"Maya! You need to come over ri-"

"Yeah I'm alright," Maya interrupted and Riley rolled her eyes. It was Maya's prank voice mail.

"Sorry I'm actually not available right now. Gotcha, didn't I?" Maya's voice mail said, "Just leave your message after the beep and I'll get back to you later if I feel like it. BEEEP."

"Maya! Maya, you need to come over, right now! Okay? Bay Window. Right. Now." Riley hung up and threw her phone carelessly onto the Bay Window cushions beside her.

She got up and paced nervously, waiting for Maya to come through that window or to at least call back. Now that she knew them, understood them, and wasn't afraid of them, the words were screaming to get out, screaming to be said.

Barely five minutes after Riley had called her, Maya was here, pushing open the window and climbing in. Riley sat and turned to look at Maya.

"You called?" Maya asked.

"I know my feelings now, Maya." Riley said clearly.

"Riley, what? I thought we just agreed-"

But Riley cut her off, "You told me back in eighth grade that my feelings were my feelings and that I feel what I feel." Riley placed a hand on either side of Maya's face, and caressed Maya's cheek with her thumbs.

They were staring right into each other's eyes like they never had before.

"Honey, what are you doing?" Maya breathed, lost in Riley's eyes.

"What I feel," Riley whispered, leaning in.

Their lips met, soft and tender at first, almost hesitant, but their intensity grew, until the whole world was just the two of them, kissing in their Bay Window.

And it was perfect.

"Wow," Maya whispered, when they finally broke apart.

"I love you," Riley said, placing her hand under Maya's chin, "Those are my words too you," she whispered, pulling Maya in for another kiss.


End file.
